What sacrifice is worth it?

What are your intentions? Not the ones you want the world to hear – truly, in the depths of your heart.

Maybe you’re working hard for financial independence and stability, so it makes sense that you’d work 60+ hour weeks and “temporarily” sacrifice time with your family and kids because – after all – financial freedom is a noble goal. But what is the end game?

Jesus says, “Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” (Matthew 6:26) He goes on to say: “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘what shall we eat?’ or ‘what shall we drink?’ or ‘what shall we wear?’ For after all these things the pagans seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” – Matthew 6:31-33

I’m not judging you. I was exactly where you are right now. I was climbing the corporate ladder, seeking the next promotion, the nicer car, the bigger house, travel, nice things, needs AND wants. It was never enough; there was always one step higher, one thing better, one person doing more than I was…and the drive to keep going never ended. Truthfully, I didn’t know it was possible to live a secure, happy life without that hustle.

We’ve glorified the word “hustle.” We admire those on the grind. We look up to them, and idolize them, and we think if we can just go a little further – we’ll get to the point where we can…what, stop? I’ve got news for you – there is always someone bigger, someone richer, someone stronger – pick your vice, there is always someone better.

Four months ago, I decided it wasn’t worth it anymore. My son was 16 and knew nothing but mom working all the time. Sure, he had pretty much whatever he wanted, but the thin, material-based relationship we had was suffering from the normal teenage withdrawal, and frankly there wasn’t enough left to weather this season of his life. In truth, I’m terrified it’s too little, too late – but I’m committed to turning around what I can. I don’t want him to enter adulthood thinking the most important goal in life is financial stability. (Luckily, he is a free-spirit and I can’t ever see him conforming to societal norms – and I’ll count that as a blessing from God.) My relationship with Christ was growing stronger, and the constant battle to balance time with him and time to make money was exhausting – and I was failing on the time with him part. My husband set boundaries before we ever even married, but he spent a lot of his time holding me accountable to our agreement.

So, I quit. I cut my family’s substantial income by 75%. I committed myself to 20-30 hours/week for work and the rest of the time to focus on what God needed me to be doing instead. I had no idea what that was, or how we would pay our bills; I knew “no, we can’t do that” was going to be a regular occurrence in a house of teenagers used to hearing “yes, of course.” But I knew God was calling me to obedience and for once I was going to listen. And my heart was flooded with peace for the first time in my life.

It’s been 4 months, and it’s taken me until the last month or so to get things sorted out to where it actually works. Clear-headed I now sit back and ask myself often, what on earth was I working toward? And the question is the answer – I was working for what was on earth. I was worried about appearances, success, taking care of everyone in my own strength and abilities and ignoring what God promised to provide for me. I was so wrapped up in the world’s definition of what life is supposed to be that I was missing the most incredible blessing of all – God’s provision.

And God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. – 2 Corinthians 9:8

Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” – Hebrews 13:5

Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. – Luke 12:7

What are you working for? Are you justifying the sacrifices in pursuit of money? Are you working in your own strength to succeed against the world’s measure of success? What is success? When is it enough?  Is it actually working, or do you find yourself bumping into issue after issue? Are you sure it’s God’s plan for you?

I’m here to tell you – it’s not worth it. It’s not what God wants you for. You’re not meant to work like that. You don’t need to provide, you need to rely on God and trust that when you’re focused on the right thing, he will provide in everything. Don’t wait until it’s too late. 

I fear the consequences of my decisions are yet to come…but I’m listening now, and I’m holding on to his word and his promise. Though I may walk through the shadow of my consequences, I know he will never leave my side, and I am committed from this point forward to focusing on him first; after all, he's promised that the rest will fall into place when I do. Do you trust him?